Oct 28, 1974

Something funny happened on Weds. Ya see, on the PA I made a boo-boo! They were turning the volume up and down, and when it was off I said "Oh SHIT." But the guy turned it on as I said it and the WHOLE SCHOOL HEARD ME SAY IT! It was so fucking funny, I can't believe it. When I got back into class, they gave me a standing fucking ovation!

Last nite I went to a Halloween party. I was dressed as a mime. I drank a bottle of cold duck. We left to go to some guy's house to get some hawaiian, but his parents were home so we couldn't get any. On the way there I ran a red light but i didn't know! I was trying to maintain. We went to Steve G's house and watched Saturday Night on his waterbed. This morning I have a headache.

Aleta said she'd steal some pot from her brothers and give it to me! He he he!

Guess what I did? I asked Nate to the dance! He said yes too! Except his grandparents are coming out for a visit 'cuz his brother is getting married, so he might not be able to go. I really hope he can. Alice totally freaked out when I told her.

October 18, 1979

Last Tues was progress report day. I got a D/C in Algebra. I changed  the D to a B, so it said B/C. My parents went to open house tonite and in algebra, they went over my grades. Well, my alg teacher told them I got a D/C and they were sure it said B/C (which it did!). Anyways when they came home and asked if I changed it, I said yes. After a talk about my laziness and dishonesty, they decided I can't go with June to see "Chorus Line" this weekend. Also I can't go to the football game or talk on the phone.

I'm seriously thinking of killing myself. I know it's stupid but doesn't it follow the pattern with my life? Stupid things one after the other. I'm a born loser. Everything I do in my life I end up explaining. Everything gets fucked up somehow. The world would be better without me.

October 14, 1979

FUCK.
I'm so pissed. I'm so depressed. FUCK.FUCK.FUCK.

My fuckin parents don't go for anything I do. They're fucked. I bought some pants and a top a while a go. Well, I put them on with my brown velour top and my corduroy hat. I went in the family room to show the pants to them. They fuckin started to fuckin cut me down. First, they tell say the pants are too tight. Then my father tells me my ass is hanging out which is bullshit.

Why is my life so shitty dammit?

Also, next Sat I'm going to dinner and to see "A Chorus Line" with June. Well we were planning that I'd come over in the day. But nooooo, Zoe is not allowed to drive that far. June's parents won't let her drive on the freeway, so what do I do?