February 2, 1979

Hi.
Today was the worst day in my life so far. If I was to rate my depression from 1 to 10, it would be a -10.

It all started when I went straight to english at nutrition. I was sitting there feeling horrible and so sad. I was thinking of how screwed everything has gotten recently. And, of course I started crying. Mrs Coffer, she is so sweet, asked if there was something wrong, but I said no. I should have talked to her. So, anyways all through English I was crying and/or very depressed and sick looking.

At lunch I saw him and I said really formally "Do you have any place to go?" He said no. Then without a word, we went to my locker. After that I said "Where do you want to go?" He said "I don't care." It was all so formal and stiff and so uncomfortable. Then we got outside and it was silent, so I made up something about having to go to the library. So I looked at him for a second and then said bye and left. He said bye and left.

THAT WAS IT. I was going to break up with him, but I guess I'll do it this weekend over the phone.

Anyways on to something less depressing. Alice told Jason that I was going to write him or call him and he said "Allright, does she have my phone number?" I guess he really does like me. Gee, I feel wanted. Maybe I'll call him someday, but for now, my problem's Allen.
See ya.